State of Mind

I was fall cleaning and uncovering pieces of paper with words and ideas for stories. I also found pictures, letters, and birthday cards from friends (I don’t throw anything away and maybe I should!).

In unearthing all of these materials, I was able to get rid of the pay stubs from three years ago and discovered bits of random notes that I can use for my future stories.

Unfortunately, right now I’m in home improvement mode. I’m turning my old bedroom into a study and I need a bookcase, a desk, and other neat office type furniture. I have overlooked my artistic duties to write (not even a prompt!) and instead have lost myself in Buffy and Angel episodes.

I was in a constant state of nostalgia last year when I was applying to MFA programs but that was different; there was a possibility of leaving my comfort zone. Now that I’m putting it off for another year, I’m still seeking that peace and contentment from TV shows that transport me back to when life was simpler – I was in college, taking my first ever creative writing class, fully developing physically (very late bloomer), discovering guys on a new level – I didn’t have to worry about much.

Now I’m an adult, stuck between the young twenty something age and the late twenty something age when I should have accomplished something by now. I guess living alone, devoid of the constant noise of social activity, makes anyone pensive about their lives.

This is probably the best time to write while in this state of mind. Who knows what kind of material I’ll produce?

I can set some time for writing and even write about this experience! This is what writing is about. I know better than writing only when I’m inspired. Writing is about writing even when you don’t feel like writing. So I guess this is my own pep talk to get back on it?

I guess so. šŸ™‚


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